


Dying to Save You

by N1t3sh4d3



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Angst, Chronic Illness, Inspired By Tumblr, Inspired by Fanfiction, It makes them magic now ok??, Langst, Last Minute Confessions, M/M, Misuse of Paladin bonds, Quintessence Magic, Self-Sacrifice, Terminal Illnesses
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-07
Updated: 2018-10-07
Packaged: 2019-07-27 11:44:37
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,132
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16218341
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/N1t3sh4d3/pseuds/N1t3sh4d3
Summary: Lance is hiding a secret he really shouldn't be. He's doing such a good job, no one suspects a thing. It would have been better if they did.





	Dying to Save You

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Gardian](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Gardian/gifts).



> This is my gift to [ Langsty-Mc-Langstface](https://langsty-mc-langstface.tumblr.com/) for the [Langst Autumn Event 2k18](https://archiveofourown.org/collections/LangstAutumnEvent) . I'm sorry it's so late!
> 
> I took inspiration from this [ficlet/prompt](https://langsty-mc-langstface.tumblr.com/post/178460469265/magic-alien-so-paladins-i-want-shall-aid-you-if) and The Letter AU on their blog: [Part 1](https://langsty-mc-langstface.tumblr.com/post/159880176245/the-letter), [Part 2](https://langsty-mc-langstface.tumblr.com/post/160421245315/the-letter), [Part 3](https://langsty-mc-langstface.tumblr.com/post/169785004710/the-letter)
> 
> I DID take some liberties, but I highly recommend reading them after.
> 
> Comments and Kudos are welcome.

          Lance the checked the scanner second time. He was hoping it would say something different, but he knew better. He had swiped the scanner after helping Coran calibrate all of them. He had carefully adjusted the pods and the other scanners to read normal for him. He didn't want anyone else to find out how sick he really was. He knew it was a dumb idea, but he couldn't handle the others finding out. Especially when he had lost hope, after that first time in the pod. The pod seemed to make him better and he been so excited. Unfortunately, within a few weeks the readings were back to normal. Every time he went into the pod, it seem to extend his time a little bit longer, only for it to fall back  According to the latest readings, he had little over a year. That would be enough to make sure when the time came, he could make sure he went out in a blaze of glory. Or at least saving someone.

          He had heart issues all along. After having several surgeries to correct them as a child, everything seemed to be looking up. Lance was hoping that being part of the Galaxy Garrison would get him up into space without it being too obvious. He was doing fine up until the last time he'd gotten sick. The bout with rheumatic fever had pushed him over the edge. Then it just seemed to be one thing after another. The tachycardia and the fatigue started to set in again. Once the lions took them, he wasn't sure what was going to happen. Luckily, the food goo had enough nutrients and was healthy enough, it helped him feel a little better. Not enough to heal him, but enough to help stabilize him.  

          Now things were looking grim, his heart just wasn't able to take it. He had been dancing around heart failure for weeks, and now it looked like it may have finally started to set in. He had asked Coran about a bunch of things, including heart issues, to hopefully get some ideas. But Coran didn't really know that much about detailed medicine, more of general practice knowledge.  Lance was definitely going to be watching his time. It gave him all the more reason to be silly and amp up the goofball part.

 

Thankfully, things had been going decently for a while. No major battles, no surprise attacks. Just diplomatic missions. It was only when they landed on Alma, which Lance thought was highly ironic, that he realized he should have figured things would go wrong.

          The natives were very nice people. They were willing to join the Coalition and had some great resources but, they needed their help.They use magic but not quite like the Alteans. Their magic came from their planet. The planet had been almost totally razed by the Galra. They had hoped with Allura”s Altean magic, they could bring some life back to the planet. They had managed some on their own, but they weren't quite strong enough. Allura was trying her best, but this planet wasn't like the Balmera. It wasn’t alive in the same way. Any energy she dumped into it would have to dissipate through the entire planet. Granted it wasn't the biggest planet out there, but it was definitely taking time. She had been doing a little every day to make sure she didn't burn herself out. This was at Coran’s insistence, after the first time she tried and passed out.

          The others did what they could, helping to find new wells, planting what seeds they could and helping take care of some of the injured. Pidge and Hunk were squirreled away with some of the other scientists, trying to work on, some sort of geothermal thing? Lance wasn't really sure, but it sounded pretty impressive. Keith was hovering nearby not sure what to do. He had tried to help, but the natives must have sensed that he was half Galra or something, because they didn't want to have anything to do with him. It made things a little awkward, especially since neither party would say anything. Lance wasn't sure if it was just a misunderstanding or worse.

Lance wandered, trying to see what he could help with. He decided to take Allura some water.  Allura definitely look like she was overdoing it.

“Hey Allura, I brought you some water. You really should take a break. You're looking awfully pale and we don't want you to pass out again.” Lance said tentatively.

“Yeah, that's what I've been trying to tell her for the past 20 minutes. She's not listening. At this point I'm ready to get Shiro! Or better yet, Coran!” Keith grumbled

          “I'll have you know, I know exactly what I'm doing.” Allura snapped, as she paused to stand up and take the water pack. Taking a step forward, was not quite as regal as she intended, as she wavered slightly. When her knee started to buckle, Keith and Lance each grabbed a forearm to support her. At that point something odd started happening. The ground around them begin to glow. Allura was the only one to notice, the boys too focused on her.

          As Keith and Lance began to lower her down, she decided to try something. Ignoring the concern written on their faces, she held them tight and started channeling energy once again. Both of them let out a small gasp but otherwise stayed put. Lance look down to see what exactly Allura thought she was doing, ready to snap at her, when he noticed the glow as well. He shifted his arm just a little so he could tap Keith on his hand. Keith looked at him questioningly behind Allura's head. Lance flicked his eyes down to the ground. Once Keith saw his eyes became wide as saucers. But after a moment Allura stopped as her legs completely gave out.

“What do you think you were doing?? That could have been really dangerous!”

“Are you alright? What were you thinking?” Keith and Lance begin talking over each other demanding answers. Allura just smiled at them.

“I need to try something. I will rest first though, before you say anything else. But there's something I think may work.”

 

          No one was pleased once Keith ran and got everyone. Hunk demanded that she eat a nutritious snack, once he got back. A few hours later, after Coran enforced a nap, lots of water and Hunk’s snack, Allura didn't look quite so pale. She called everyone into the little room that the Almans had set up for them.

          “I believe that your quintessence levels may be enough to help recharge this planet. I would like to try something.” Allura got up, ignoring the protests and motion for them to follow her. Once outside they moved to the side of the building. Allura sat down and looked at the others expectantly. Shiro shrugged and they followed suit. Allura closed her eyes for a moment and the reached out a hand to Shiro. Surprised, he took it. Allura looked as though she was concentrating and a faint glow began to show up on the ground

 

          Frowning, she let got of Shiro’s hand and looked to Hunk as the glow disappeared. After another attempt, the glow was brighter and spread further. Pidge got an even brighter glow and it rippled out to the path near the cottage, a good 10 feet away. Keith made it stretch to the next building. Lance surprised everyone by making it reach the town square.

Allura looked delighted. “If you are all willing, we can combine our quintessence and heal the planet in just a few varga! Look at what's happened where each of you touched.”

          Allura was right. Hunk’s area was warm, the ground almost soaking up the sunlight. Pidge's area was lush green, flowers blooming and trees perking up. Keith's area was also warm, but it felt like a pulse beating, as if the inner circle of the planet was pumping it's lifeblood through itself again. Shiro's area was cool but felt more connected to the planet’s innate magic. Lance's area was cool, but the underground streams could be felt rushing along.

“It will take all of us, but I believe we can do it."

One of the elders rushed over, awe painted on their face. “You have done it!”

"Not completely. We have a plan and a small start. As you can see, we need something a bit stronger.” The areas they had revitalised were fading a bit. “This will require a great deal of energy.”

The elder nodded, "We will provide out most skilled priests and priestess to help. This is beyond what we were hoping for!”

“We will work on our strategy. We should be prepared in a quintet. Although, perhaps a meal before we start?”

"Yes, we need to eat. I don't want to pass out while we're trying this,” Hunk stated firmly.

The elder merely nodded and left.

 

          Allura explained quickly that because of their bonds with the Lions and each other, they should be able to channel a bit of their quintessence to Allura who would be able to use it to heal the planet. The only drawback was not knowing how much quintessence was needed, or how it would affect them. Coran was going to keep watch and stop them of it began to take too large of a toll.

          The elder came to them later that evening. He wanted to make sure they had a hearty meal and were rested enough to proceed. As Allura and the elder went over details, Lance began to get uncomfortable. Apparently, this had been the way they had recharged the planet in olden times. Generations ago it was the only way. They had found better ways, so the recharges laster longer and they were able to charge it more often, if needed.  The Galra had destroyed everything they used for that method. This way, it had taken a priest or priestess giving up half of their life force. Spreading it through this many people it would only be a minor affect. Perhaps a year would be lost? Or less, it was hard to say.

Lance balked at that.

Everyone else readily agreed. They all look to him expectantly.

“Come on just say yes. It's only a year.” Keith said quietly.

“Yeah, but when you're dying, a year's a lifetime.”

“It's better than losing the war.” Keith pointed out.

“Fine... Let's do this.”

 

          They moved into a large, flat, dusty field. There was an imposing altar with a large, grayish, Balmeran crystal set in the center. Allura strode up to the crystal and gently rested her hands on it. The other paladins stood in a ring around her. Shiro was directly behind her, Keith to his right. Lance stood to Keith’s right. Hunk and then Pidge completed the circle. The elder stood behind Shiro and the rest of the higher ranking priests and priestesses fanned out around the paladins. Lance looked back and saw that it looked like a sea of people. There was a faint signal, then energy started to flow into him.

          He closed his eyes and gently directed it forward to Allura. He felt the coolness of the water beneath the surface, as it began to bubble up into the aquifers. The energies from the rest of the Voltron crew radiated around and through him. He felt the heat from Keith. The calming touch of the planet’s innate magic from Shiro. The stability returning to all the stone from Hunk. The energy of life sprouting from Pidge. Allura‘s energy safely wrapping them all together. It felt nice.

          The energy grew for a few ticks, then began to drain away. After a few doboshes Lance was starting to feel tired. He hoped this wouldn’t take too much longer. He cracked an eyelid and saw the most gorgeous prismatic waves of energy radiating off of Allura and the crystal. At his small gasp the others peeked. A stunned awe filled all of them. They were doing this? The flow of energy began to slow down. Soon it was just a trickle and then it stopped. Lance opened his eyes all the way. The field they had been standing in was now flush with life. Trees were green, flowers were blooming and a small creek had begun to run again. The awed silence behind him only echoed how he felt. They headed back to the town, everyone staring in wonder, at everything they passed.

          Coran was met by some very excited scientists. It looked like the quintessence infusion they had done, restarted the planet’s natural cycle. The planet was well on it’s way to healing. They would only need to rebuild the machines the Galra had destroyed to keep this from happening again. Coran, Pidge and Hunk began working on schematics and plans to replicate them.

          “We are forever indebted to you, Princess Allura. Thank you so much! Let us finish the agreements between the coalition and our people. We wish to begin the proceedings, we discussed, as soon as possible.” The elder was overwhelmed by the events and the lengths Voltron had gone to for his people.

“We are happy to help our allies. It looks like it will be a few varga before the parts you need are completed. That should be enough time to finish our discussions,” Allura said with a smile.

          The night ended with a signed treaty, a worldwide oath of allegiance, a huge feast, fixed machines and a completely exhausted crew. They were still riding high on the flush of the amazing victory. Sure, it wasn’t a battle, but this was the first time they had been able to use real magic. It made most of them giddy. The walk back to the castle had been cheerful. Once they got into the main hall, there was a debate as to whether they need sleep or more time to talk.

Lance began to retreat slowly from all the talk, lost in thought.

Keith said playfully, “You off to mope?”

“Something like that.”

 

          Once Lance got back to his room, he checked the scanner again. The ceremony had taken more than he had thought. Instead of half of year like he had hoped, it now showed he had only had a little less than a phobe. Full on heart failure. Lance cried quietly to himself. This wasn't exactly what he had in mind. He decided to skip the snack Hunk had been planning, as his stomach was in knots and he didn't think he could keep anything down. He hoped he'd be at least be able to get through the next few weeks without showing symptoms. If they noticed that, everything would be over. He couldn't risk them putting everything aside to try to help him.

The next morning he woke up and reconsidered his options. He decided the best thing to do, was enjoy the time he had left with them as much as possible. Even if they saw him is annoying and obnoxious, he still wanted to do it.

 

He harassed Pidge more about game nights. He took to hanging out in the workshop with her and Hunk.

Lance begged Hunk to help him cook some of his favorite meals, so he could share them with the other paladins. Hunk eyed him suspiciously a few times, but Lance just smiled brighter and playfully teased him about being a worrywart.

          He spent as much time as he could with Coran going over some schematics listening to his stories and helping him clean different areas of the ship. He wasn't much help with the mechanical things, other than handing tools, but he found that's when Coran talks the most. It didn’t take much to get Coran to run a weekly game of Monsters and Mana.

          Luckily, he and Allura had been getting closer as friends. But randomly popping in with a spa day the first time, made his stomach twist in anticipation. What if she was suspicious? Would she say yes? How easy with this be able to pull off? Fortunately, he timed it right. Following a particularly difficult negotiation, with a rather stubborn species, she was really worn out. Talking her into some relaxation and pampering was easy. After the first few times, he started dragging Pidge with him as well. Soon enough, just as he hoped, Pidge and Allura were hanging out more. He knew that as girls they had a lot in common, even though they were from completely different worlds. Everybody needs a good friend that understands them. Although Hunk was one of her best friends, sometimes it's nice to hang out with just one of the girls. At least that's what his sister always said.

          Shiro was a bit more reserved; it was harder to find stuff to do with him. Then inspiration struck. Lance dragged Shiro to the pool. He kept talking about what good exercise it was and how much it could improve stamina. Lance knew he was grasping at straws. He was thrilled when Shiro just laughed at him and asked how soon they were going to race. Lance made sure to dramatically cry foul when Shiro beat him in the butterfly. It made Shiro laugh so hard he almost choked on some of the water he was treading.  It made him happy to see Shiro so relaxed. They got into splashing wars a few times. Between the two of them, they got the rest of the team to join them on more than one occasion. Lance relished being in the pool. It also helped soothe his muscles and lower his temperature. He had been running about 100 since the ceremony.

          Keith, that was the hardest one. Lance knew he had to be careful about this. He didn't want to accidentally blurt out how much he cared or how deeply he felt. He made sure to lock those feelings away a long time ago. He also didn't want to give away how sick he was. So the easiest thing to do, was antagonize Keith. Playfully, of course. The trash talk was at an all time high. Which of course lead to sparring. They would spar more than ever.  

          Overall, Lance tried to convince himself he was content. Sure, he was more exhausted than he had ever been. Coming back from the pool with Shiro or sparring with Keith would force him to nap for a few hours. He had managed to replicate some of his heart medication, from what he had left. That helped with the tachycardia. His appetite was shrinking. He was doing his best.

          His friends would roll their eyes and complain, but they would smile brightly. He could tell that a lot of it was teasing. Between Hunk and Keith though, he had to be very careful. They were the most suspicious. He knew his lame excuses were getting very flimsy. Time is running out.

  


The next mission they had ended up being the one that cost him the most. According to the scanner he was down to just a few quintant. He figured at this point, if something happened where he could save someone, he’d do it.

They had snuck onto a Galra station. Pidge was busy hacking for information, while Lance and Hunk stood guard. Shiro and Keith were scouting for the odd quintessence that was stored here.

“Got it!” Pidge said triumphantly. “Shiro, it’s in the storage room to your left. The keyplate should still recognize your hand. Keith, there’s a corridor to the right. There’s not much listed on here about it. Does it look important?”

“Pidge, there’s nothing here.” Shiro’s confusion was cut short a moment later by Keith.

“That’s because it’s where I am.”

“What?” Pidge flipped the map around several times. “The map just shows a large space. I thought-”

“It’s a loading bay. Just like the last one I found. Same quintessence too.”

Pidge tapped a few more spots on her map. It flared to life as dots decorated it. “Quiznack...Shiro, there’s something near you. Is it a sentry or an officer?”

After a moment of tense silence Shiro’s voice echoed through the comms. “Sentries. They look to be deactivated. Most are in pieces.”

Pidge made a few adjustments, then sent the maps to everyone.

“There...doesn’t seem to be anyone here,” Keith mumbled in disbelief.

“There are a few coming close to that area, but it looks like just sentries.”

Lance glanced at the map. Keith was cornered in a way. The room he was in was vast. There looked to be another exit, but a large group of pale purple dots was heading down that section. Lance made up his mind.

          “I’m going to back up Keith. Pidge and Hunk are safe here. Shiro, you’re on the opposite side of the ship. Keith, stay hidden. There’s a group heading into your section. I’ll be there in five doboshes” There were murmurs of agreement as Lance took off.

 

          He was worried. Would he get there in time? Would the sentries even go down that hall? Would Keith be safe enough? Would he ever be brave enough to tell Keith how he felt? Lance knew that last one was because he was stalling. If he said something, it would make everything awkward. Keith didn’t feel that way about him. Lance didn’t want to mess things up. Was it really fair to drop that sort of bomb on someone, knowing you didn’t have very long? Would be he be cruel enough to make Keith live with that knowledge? Would it even matter?

          Thankfully, since this was infiltration, they had to be quiet. He was able to move slowly, which helped keep his heart rate and breathing down. He rounded a corner to see a platoon of sentries entering a large room. The same room, the map kindly reminded him, that Keith was in. Taking a deep breath, he began to speak quietly.

“Keith, I’m just a hall away. The map is showing a whole platoon heading your way.”

“I see them too. They are still pretty far away. I wonder where they are going to load this stuff.”

“A battle cruiser just entered the system!” Coran’s shocked voice rang over the comms.

“All right everyone, let’s get out of here. Keith is there another way out?” Shiro asked.

“Just the door in and the large bay doors.”

Lance gauged the situation.

The map showed Keith, more to the center of the room but closest to the door that lead into the hall. If Lance could slip in and then distract the troops, then Keith could escape. Then Lance noticed a few more dots heading where the others were.

“Get out of here you guys! There looks like that there’s more heading your way!”

          “Damn it! Okay, just a sec. Shiro take this path! It should avoid all of them,” a section of the map flared a silvery color. “Hunk and I are taking this path,” another path lit up a pale lime. “Lance. Keith. I...I can’t find a good path for both of you. The best would be this,” a light plum path lit up. It was the most direct path. Unfortunately,, it ran right through where the sentries were. There was a collective groan.

“I have an idea. You guys get to the lions. Keith and I will be there shortly.” Lance said quietly.

“What are you thinking Lance?” came the suspicious demands.

Lance only smiled to himself. “You better get moving. Those sentries are getting close.”

Shiro sighed. “He’s right. Pidge and Hunk, get moving. That group of sentries is getting really close. Lance. Keith. Be careful.”

 

          Lance watched the dots that represented his friends move away. Once they were where he considered safe, he looked around the corner again. The way the map showed the sentries, he was afraid that they would be right there. Fortunately, it looked like they hadn’t gotten that far yet. He jogged over to the door, slipping in quietly. He found Keith crouched behind some crates. There were a few more piles near the entrance.

Keith nearly jumped out of his skin when Lance crept up beside him. “Lance! What the hell are you doing in here?” he hissed.

          Lance smirked. “Saving your butt.” At Keith’s glower, Lance continued, “Look, there are far too many for you to get through at close range. You need someone with long range attacks. Look, if we head out this way, we can avoid the troops that are headed this way. ” Lance traced a path that would take them in the opposite direction, then pointed to an intersection. “The sentries that were in this section, headed to where Pidge and Hunk were. At the rate they are moving, we can be out of here before they get back.”

Keith nodded, then paused. “What about all this? You heard Coran. There’s already a ship here to load it. We can’t just leave it.”

“We’ll have more luck taking care of this with the lions.” Hunk pointed out.

“There’s no way for us to program it blow up right now,” Pidge spoke up. “I mean I _can_ do it, I just need some time. Maybe a few doboshes?”

“Go ahead and get started on that once you are back at your lion. You two get out of there.” Shiro said.

“Well, you heard the man! Let get out of here.” Lance winked at Keith, who rolled his eyes.

          Lance smiled, then checked the map. The route he had highlighted on Keith’s map still showed relatively clear. Once they made it past this corridor. Which was going to be a bit of a challenge now. The sentries had gotten closer. They were going to have to fight their way out. Keith caught sight of Lance’s map. Before he could say anything the door opened and a wave of sentries flooded in. Unsurprisingly, there were two Galra officers.

 

          They watched as the officers headed to the control console and began making the preparations to load the cruiser once it docked. There was murmuring, but they were too far away to hear clearly. Lance could see Keith was struggling with wanting to leave and wanting to find out more information. Then the words 'Druids’ 'weapon’ 'experiments’ 'Haggar’ 'destruction’ floated over. They exchanged a look. There was no way to know if that had been all one sentence or not. Either way, it didn’t mean anything good.

“What should we do? Finding out what they are planning might be worth it,” Lance asked.

“I don’t know.  We should get out of here. Pidge will be done with the code soon and this place will blow. But finding out what’s going on is a good idea too.” Keith looked torn.

Pidge's voice came over the comms, “I'm back at Green. I need 10 doboshes to get this virus done.”

“Looks like we have our answer. It’ll take us about five for us to get to the loins.” Lance said.

          They moved towards the door at a crouch. They had gotten almost to it, when a sentry entered. Suddenly, the sound of Pidge’s whoop of joy echoed through their helmets. “It’s done and uploaded! HA! Take that! Guys, you have about five doboshes.”

          The sentry looked right at them and raised its a blaster. Lance managed to get off as shot right away. That of course gave away their position. Soon they were pinned down behind a group of crates nearest the door. Lance flipped to a private channel.

“What now? We can’t keep this up.” Keith sounded a bit antsy.

“Follow me!”

Lance dashed forward, keeping a constant stream of fire. Keith rushed behind him to open the door. It slid open but the blaster fire picked up.

 

          Lance turned slightly and looked at Keith rather seriously. “Look, I know this is a bad situation and terrible time, but I just needed you to know... how much I care about you. I was always fighting and bugging you, because it at least got me some of your attention. I know it was dumb. You mean the world to me. I know you don't feel the same way. I just needed to let you know.”

Keith looked incredibly shocked. Why would Lance think he didn't feel the same? “What are you talking about? What makes you think that? Lance-”

But Lance just smiled and shoved Keith through the door, sealing him into the safety of the hall.

Keith quickly tried to open the door, but the faceplate was scalding hot. Lance had blasted it.

“Lance! Lance you idiot! Let me back in!” Keith beat on the door. “Come on you fool!”

Silence greeted the statement. Keith realized Lance had shut off his comm. There was no background noise, even though the sound of battle raged.

 

“Keith? Lance? Status!” Shiro’s voice snapped Keith into action. He began running to the lions, while flipping to the main channel.

“Shiro! Lance-”

“Keith! How close are you to the lions? The place is set to blow in less than a dobosh!” Pidge cut through.

“Is there a way to stop the countdown?”  
  
“Why? It looks like you only need a thirty ticks before you get to the lions.”

That’s what I’m trying to -”

“We’re almost there.” Keith let out an angry snarl at Lance’s comment.

“Shut up you LIAR! Pidge, you need to stop the countdown! Lance is trapped with those sentries!”

 “WHAT!?”

Silence echoed through the comms. There was no sound of background noise or any response from Lance. He had shut all the channels off. Or at least muted them.

Frantically typing, Pidge started muttering, “C’mon. C’mon. There has to be a way to slow…...oh no. It’s already half way through the self destruct sequences.”

Keith ran as fast as he could and got to Red. As he slid into the pilot’s seat he asked, “What is it?”

“The battle cruiser is about to dock!”

“Lance! Lance can you hear us? Turn your comm back on damnit!” Hunk was far more scared than any of them had heard before.

Red took off before Keith was completely seated. “Red what the -”

          The main viewscreen lit up. The station hung in space, the battlecruiser already beginning to dock. He had a flash of hope when he caught Blue on the corner of the screen. Then a bloom of red and orange painted the sky. The explosion rippled through the cruiser and the station.

They held their breath for a moment. Then the deepest sadness they had ever felt crashed through the bonds between them.

  


Lance really was gone.


End file.
